Foundation is still there...

As most know, we had a baby 7 mos ago and any spanking went on hiatus about a month before she was born. We had originally agreed on a month long break after the baby came for any spanking, but then she came and she was a somewhat difficult newborn and all thoughts of 30 days went out the window along with any resemblance of order in our house.



Just when things started to settle a bit, we decided to move. Well, back to total chaos!


There had been a few mentions of spanking here and there in the early days, maybe around two months ago, but nothing since.

So, where are we?? Not sure. I know the HOH dynamic is still going. I have noticed that Hunter is much more comfortable in expressing his desires as far as how things should be done. He is more active in the day to day decisions too and is not as quick to avoid conflict.


I am definitely in a much more submissive and calm place than I was when we first started DD. I have a deeper trust in his ability to run things and make the decisions that are best for us as a family. I am much better about consulting him before making any big decisions as well.


This week, we had a situation that I saw this show itself. Last weekend we had a big snowstorm which close school for our kids Monday through Wednesday. On Thursday, school was back in session but the temperatures were still very frigid and the residential roads were horrible! I really wanted to keep the kids home and Hunter and I went back and forth many times on Wednesday afternoon and evening on what the best decision was. On Thursday morning, he said he thought they should go as long as they were bundled warm enough. He pretty much left it up to me for the final decision, but made his opinion clear. Although, I was very hesitant, I decided to defer to him and send them to school. It worked out. They bundled up really well and the buses were right on time so they only waited about five minutes. Once it was all said and done, I felt really good about going with what he wanted. In the past I would've been very territorial with the decision and not given him a second thought.

So, the HOH dynamic is alive and well, but the DD side is dying a slow death.

I thought I'd be more upset about the idea. Part of me is okay with the absence, but a bigger part really misses the connection we had with DD.

Our new house is not as DD friendly as the other one, so in the back of my mind, I wonder if it will ever come back or not. I know this won't get easier as the kids get older either.


I really want to leave it up to him if and when to resume the DD side, but at the same time, I'm starting to feel disconnected in a way and the urge to brat surfaces from time to time.


I dont' do well with uncertainty because it's harder to control a situation so maybe this is teaching me patience.

I will talk to Hunter about all of this soon. Writing it all out has helped me gather my thoughts.

April